Aurora Anderson
Reaching
I reached my boiling point,
I reached the point of unnecessary reactions,
I reached thinking with emotion and no rational thought.
I reached the point of peak anger levels,
and it felt so horribly wrong.
This isn’t who I am,
I can’t even recognize myself in the mirror,
and so, I sat.
I sat with my anger, until I realized it’s mask.
I reached over to disassemble the appearance,
and then,
I drank with my disappointment
I smoked with my frustrations
I yelled at my failures
I cried into my embarrassment
I lashed out with my shame
I sobbed with my stress until it poured down the drain
I broke down with my trauma
I sang with my regrets
I struggled to breathe as my anger dismantled
and crushed me with the sheer size of the iceberg I had front of me
and then,
I shook hands with what was left of my “anger” and realized I was completely overwhelmed.
I picked myself up.
I held onto those dear to me.
I asked for help.
I reached out to my therapist.
I committed to getting better.
I let go of the emotions I let build up.
I said thank you, and goodbye, to the remains of the iceberg that had melted in my bathtub.
—Submitted on
Aurora Anderson is a mixed Métis woman. Living on Treaty 7 land in Calgary, her indigenous roots are from Québec. She holds a BA from the University of Calgary with a major in English literature and a minor in psychology.
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